The modern society has gifted us with unlimited boons, including tremendous advancement in the field of technology and science, expansion of knowledge in every field, the virtual removal of the inconvenience created by physical distance etc. We are just a click away from everything. Such developments and advancements have unshackled our Indian society from a number of restrictions of the past as well as unreasonable prejudices. Even though we are not completely free yet, there has been great progress and that is undeniable.
In the face of these changes, the relations that we share between each other, especially in a family has undergone much change. The change is most observable within the educated middle-class. Today, the ties between parents and children have become much more informal and open than before. Of course I do not claim that all those who belong to this class have seen a drastic change in the character of their familial relationships; but a significant number among us can honestly claim today that our relation with our parents is rather friendly. As a result of this change, communication channels between parents and children are far more open, clear and effective, thus both parties can talk to each other freely on a number of important issues, which affect their lives.
Despite this welcome change in the relationship dynamics shared between parents and children, even today most parents shy away from addressing the topic of sex education with their children.
Tip toeing around or completely avoiding the addressing of the subject, not only leaves the children unaware, but also makes them equally vulnerable to a lot of misconceptions, resulting in mistakes which can lead to disastrous consequences in many cases. To make matters worse, this discomfort with the very subject of sex education is passed on to the next generation, who begin to view talking about it, asking genuine queries etc. as taboo, and consequently end up perpetuating the avoidance mentality.
This state of affairs is especially worrisome today, as presently the importance of proper sex education has grown by leaps and bounds. This is so because times have changed today, especially in terms of two important areas of our lives – that of societal conditions and our mental/physical growth rates.
Today children develop at a faster rate both physically and mentally. The changes most take effect around the time they hit puberty. At this time their bodies and minds begin to go through changes hitherto completely unknown to them. Not only do they begin to experience the first signs of sexuality in them, but given the progress in technology and our society on the whole, they are subjected to a deluge of information, which make their minds go through an equally rapid change and grapple with topics which previously were not even thought fit for those their age. As a result, they become exceedingly vulnerable, especially with regards to how to deal with their newfound and increasing sexuality. This makes an open, honest communication on how to deal with these changes all the more necessary to them.
But rarely are they informed and educated on the subject by their parents or teachers, in our society. Most children usually obtain their knowledge from hearsay, garbled conversations between other ill-informed peers of theirs, observing adults or their peers etc. The gaps in their knowledge further worsen when they watch certain shows or movies, misinterpret them and try to emulate the same in their personal lives. This sort of learning is not only limited but also faulty, further since at this age children are highly impressionable, they allow much of the glamorized media messages to dictate what their goals and actions should be like. Peer pressure and the desire to fit into the ‘in crowd’ no matter how wrong they may be, also colour their goals and actions. For e.g. some of them come to think that the logical culmination of sexual relations is a lifelong partnership or marriage, others come to think that ‘scoring’ with multiple partners is ‘cool’, and a number of other misconceptions related to sexuality and/or sexual intimacy. And what makes it worse is that, most of them are almost clueless about safe sex. As a result of this there are rising cases of teenage pregnancies and abortion today, and since our society is not even ready to talk about this topic openly, kids who become involved in such cases are shunned by one and all, thereby causing lasting mental trauma and damage.
The problem begins with our society’s irrational reluctance to openly talk about our bodies. Gratification of desires and needs comes much later, even natural bodily processes like menstruation in girls are still viewed with much negativity, and surrounded by multiple restrictions on their personal and social lives today. The use of dark plastic bags to make sure that no one can see that one is carrying a sanitary napkins package attaches a sense of shame to a naturally occurring physical function. Same goes with condoms and contraceptives. There is a sense of taboo and negativity surrounding anything that relates to the body and sexuality, and unless such irrational treatment of the issue are done away with, generation after generation of minors will be made vulnerable to repercussions of misinformation and unawareness like STDs, teenage pregnancies, indulging in intimacy when they are not ready and so on, affecting both their present and futures, permanently.
