While a secure and happy family environment is considered a bare necessity for healthy growth and development, there is a fine line between caring and caring too much. Children must be allowed room to grow up and make mistakes, so that they develop the skill and will to rescue themselves and become Empathic . Most parents want their children to be the Star of the Class, the top of the every subject. We must aim high to reach our utmost potential but there is, however, a saying that “Expecting a Fish to Climb a tree and Rabbit to fly” Modern society is a very competitive place.
#Honesty and #Humbleness are unfortunately shown sarcasm. #Good Deeds are questioned and Bad deeds regularly ignored. #Power and #Money have become prime needs for survival. Parents always want the best for their children. They often dream of their children attending the TOP universities , securing the most respectable job in modern society. They work and earn so they can care for their child. A parent can now keep track of their child’s academic results, assignments, levels and reports.
LET US NOW LOOK AT THE STUDENT/ CHILD VIEWPOINT
Most Parents, obsess over these scores so much, that the need for their child to achieve the top score overtakes everything else. Parental pressure leads to Stress and Anxiety. The child is always studying, is stressed, and faces anxiety and fears doing badly. Sleep deprivation, eating disorders, excessive worrying, cheating, burnout, loss of interest in hobbies and withdrawal from friends and family can be among the consequences of excess pressure. When students are burdened with such high expectations, good intentions go astray.
Children are always expected to score high in order to make their parents proud. What happens is when they get crushed by the high expectations and are unable to achieve?.
Depression, Anger, in the worst case Suicide.
Teenage years represent the time when a child goes through mental and physical changes. They need to fit into society. They desire to be attractive and/or highly academic. Parents are usually their Fallback and thus parental pressure could bring forth a breakdown.
Parents need to guide them into becoming a Resourceful person. Someone who can Think on their feet. They need to provide just enough supervision, morals to enable the kid have enough space to make his/her own decisions. Instead of Getting Involved , encourage them to come up with their own Ideas of how to deal with a certain issue ..It could be slightly wrong. Give them the direction and backup to help them grow. Moderation is the key.
Make them learn from Mistakes.
The biggest mistake parents make is vying with other parents in such a way that they argue with a teacher about the marks allotted or cut in a subject. Please do make allowance for the teacher to reprimand them. Don’t mollycoddle them by writing a note saying they were sick. “let them face the music. Good parenting requires parents to #nurture their child’s strengths and help out with their weaknesses instead of forcing attributes upon them. Make sure your child is happy with what they are pursuing. Just like adults, children need a ‘check-out’ time to alleviate tension and reduce stress.
Positive parenting is a key and it starts with: #Introspection, #Encouragement and Sufficient #Interaction
I THINK, IT IS THE ONLY WAY TO RAISE, STRONG, SMART AND SENSIBLE CHILDREN.
Would love all your feedback please.
Shishir Mandya
can be reached at smandya@gmail.com
